


Learn To Breathe

by Sharkseye



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Depression, Gen, Implied/Aftermath of Child Abuse, Kink Meme, Pre-Redemption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-01
Updated: 2014-11-04
Packaged: 2018-02-23 10:53:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2544983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sharkseye/pseuds/Sharkseye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the Guardians find out that Ronan has a daughter who's being used as incentive for him to destroy Xandar, they capture him and hand him over to the Xandarians instead of killing him.  Afterwards they travel to Thanos' realm to find out if this daughter is indeed real and in need of help, or merely a misdirection by a defeated opponent.</p><p>Kink meme prompt inside.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> EDIT: This story was edited on May 26, 2017. There will be no sequel. Unfortunately while I know I'd said there'd probably be one, editing this has cemented for me that I've fallen too far out of the Marvel fandom to devote as much time and thought as my sequel outline would require. I'm very sorry to the people who wanted one.
> 
> This is canon-divergence in a few ways, mainly that Ronan doesn't have a daughter in the movies and is destroying Xandar of his own free will. Also, that part where Ronan remembers killing Drax's family and mocks him for it never happens. 
> 
>  
> 
> Kink meme prompt:  
> It was not too long ago that Drax was begging Ronan for the lives of his wife and daughter. And now, rendered powerless after his defeat on Xandar, Ronan finds himself begging for his own life so that he can continue to raise his daughter.
> 
> And Drax simply cannot bring himself to kill Ronan, knowing that he has a little girl to raise.
> 
> Bonus:
> 
> *Thanos was holding Ronan's daughter captive as incentive for Ronan to follow through with the plot to destroy Xandar. This is the real reason that Ronan detests Thanos

The fate of the Xandarians had long ceased to matter to Ronan. Thanos’ fate didn’t matter. Even his own fate no longer mattered. Truthfully, the only person whose fate did matter anymore was one he could do nothing to protect, other than blindly follow orders and hope the Titan kept his word on letting live. His daughter. His beautiful Dassa who Thanos was keeping caged like a pet, far away from where Ronan was now.

Ronan glanced to the side, where the infinity gem inlaid into his hammer rested so innocently. He did this, and she would be free.

Bitterly Ronan closed his eyes, wondering if they would ever truly be free. Free someplace where he could raise his daughter in peace without having to move every few years, live under false identities, and constant fear. If the former two were hopeless wishes, the last was an impossibility, especially with how easy they'd been found, despite all the precautions they'd taken.

Thanos had promised though, said that Ronan could have his daughter back after he destroyed Xandar, harvesting the people living there for the Titan in his continued—insane—attempt to court death. Afterwards Ronan was to bring the infinity gem to him, trading it in exchange for his child. While Ronan didn’t personally care about the millions of people who would die on Xandar—in fact, as a Kree Accuser he was almost sure he would’ve ended up killing them anyways—having had a child of his own made him think of them individually, think of all the families, innocent children like his Dassa who he’d be killing. Before she'd been born that had never been a problem. Now, there was little else he could focus on in regards to the murders he would soon commit. That was, of course, when he could be bothered to think such thoughts, everything else consumed by the desire to have his child safely returned to him.

“We approach Xandar” Korath’s voice broke through Ronan’s worries and he glanced to the side where Nebula and The Pursuer stood, watching him.

Both of them knew why he did this, and they pitied him for it.

Unable to stand the looks in their eyes, he glanced sharply away again, staring out over the long walkway of the ship. They approached Xandar.  One way or another, it would be over soon. For his daughter. Anything, for Dassa.

Ronan closed his eyes and breathed out slowly. Anything.

 

~*~

 

And then there was after.

After the Dark Ather appeared in Xandarian skies.  After Drax and his fellow companions had boarded and made their way towards the villainous Ronan, after Rocket crashed the Milano into the Accuser, after Groot died to save them, after Ronan survived, after Peter Quill grabbed the infinity gem. After Ronan the Accuser, the deliverer of the justice of the Kree, murderer of thousands including Drax’s own family, after he _begged_ for them to help his young daughter and they had let him live on the off chance he wasn’t lying—because having lost his own family, his own innocent daughter, Drax couldn’t make the choice to do the same to another.   After Ronan was taken in by the Nova Corps, set to be executed less than a week after. After Groot had survived as a tiny tree and Peter Quill had gotten the Milano back, repaired and all, and after Drax had practically forced them to sneak into Thanos’ realm to find out if Ronan had been telling the truth or if Drax had denied himself one of his life’s greatest goals for nothing.

There was before, there was after, and there was now.

Now, in the middle of a cave of rocks, surrounded by dead creatures Drax did not know the name of, holding out a hand and gently coaxing the small,—scrawny, really—bruised up girl who looked to be the age where a child barely started to form complete sentences, Drax knew Ronan had told the truth. Not only was she exactly where he had said she was, this blue child bore an uncanny resemblance to how Ronan must look under the war paint.

“Hello there” He spoke softly, his blades on the ground in an attempt to seem friendlier, though he doubted it would work, especially after she had seen him gutting her captors like it was nothing. Still, he made an effort to smile, and he tried, “I am called Drax. What is your name?”

The little girl stared up at him suspiciously, clutching at the rags she wore and biting her lower lip. When she finally spoke, it was quiet enough that he Had to strain to hear. “Dassa.”

His hand still reached out to her, Drax repeated her name. “Dassa. Dassa, we’re here to take you away from this place. You’re safe now” Though debating the wisdom of it, when she continued her silence he added, “Ronan, your father sent us to get you”

“Papa sent you?” To Drax’s surprise, Dassa’s face lit up in joy and immediately her purple eyes darted around, checking her captors as if making sure they were dead before stumbling towards him.

It wasn’t that Drax had thought Ronan wouldn’t be a good father, it was that he had thought Ronan would be a terrible father. After all, what kind of father went around killing and destroying planets? Murdering innocents and destroying countless lives?  How could one who so carelessly did such things be a good enough father to make Dassa light up like that at a mere mention?

When Dassa was close enough she broke into a short run, stumbling into his chest and clinging to him, grasping desperately for any small scrap of comfort. Carefully wrapping his arms around her, Drax frowned at the darker bruises on her skin, scrapes that spoke of ill-treatment. Anger filled him at the thought that someone would do this to a helpless child, and he picked her up, sheathing one blade and holding the other in his free hand. All thought of Ronan as a father was pushed from his mind as he decided that he would destroy every one of these monsters who had so harmed an innocent. Her father was just as monstrous as them, but she was just a child. 

“Drax! Hurry it up, we got some more coming in” Rocket called out from the cave's entrance where him and Peter Quill waited, making Dassa flinch slightly at the new voice.

Gamora had wished to come as well, but it was agreed that she was needed to wait with the Milano and Groot, only a small distance away. They had know the girl's location, but had no idea what kind of guard Thanos had around her. Thankfully it seemed that knowing of Ronan's failure and scheduled execution had caused Thanos to become lax with security. Drax wasn't sure if that was a better outcome than her having not existed in the first place, but definitely preferred it to him having just killed her as soon as Ronan failed. 

“Hold on child.” Drax murmured, making sure he had a firm grasp on the girl before he turned away, leaving her prison behind.

“Holy shit, he wasn’t just pulling air.” Rocket exclaimed upon seeing Dassa, and Drax frowned.

Peter Quill however, got to chastising him first, and asking questions about pulling air just didn't seem that important now. “Language! You don’t swear around a kid!”

Rocket rolled his eyes, “Whoops, my bad. Now can we get the-” He paused at Drax’s murderous glare, “ _heck_ out of here?”

“I have no objections.” Drax informed them, already heading towards the Milano.

A burst of electricity that Drax recognized at Rockets gun crackled from behind and the Destroyed broke into a run as he charged through the monsters drawn there by the noise of their dying fellows, curling around Dassa to protect her from any stray shots. Only one of the creatures made it anywhere close to him and it died quickly with his blade slicing through it's neck, a hand covering the girl’s face from the gruesome death. Reaching the ship, he ducked past Gamora who was fighting off a couple more of the monsters, heading directly for the room where they'd left Groot.

Sitting Dassa down, Drax demanded medical supplies from Peter Quill as the other followed him into the room. Feeling the ship rising into the air for their escape as the Terran stumbled to follow his demands, Drax turned again to face and girl and softly asked if she'd let them aid here

Eyes widening, Dassa nodded and Drax set about to comforting the daughter of Ronan the Accuser as he examined her for wounds. One thing was certain beyond all medical aid, he decided as he brushed something like mud off of the girl’s arm and from the sorry excuse for clothing she was wearing, the poor girl definitely needed a bath.


	2. Chapter 2

Peter crossed his arms, leaning back against the wall of the cockpit and staring out the window in favor of looking at his teammates. Rocket was multitasking their conversation as he piloted the ship while Groot played in the adjoining room with Dassa, Ronan’s daughter. Say that again? Yup, _Ronan’s_ daughter. And hadn’t that been a surprise. To have the infinity gem in his hand, all ready to kill the Accuser when he surrenders and begs, _begs—_ got it yet? BEGS—for them to at least save his daughter from Thanos after they kill him.

Even more surprising though, Peter had to admit, was when Drax had been the one to listen to him, allowing him to live and then demanding that they go and check out his story. Actually no, this next part was what was most surprising. The fact that Ronan had been telling the truth about having a daughter. Seriously, at this point Peter was just expecting Yondu and Kraglin to jump out and tell him that they were his real biological parents and the whole Terran thing was just a crazy dream. He paused for a moment, thinking. Actually, no, Ronan having a kid was more surprising than that would be.  

“Alright, I hate to point out that we're lacking, but any ideas on what we're gonna’ do now?” Rocket asked the world at large, “’Cause we got the kid out of that hellhole, but her dad, who is, by the way, the only reason she trusted us enough to get on this ship, is going to be executed in three days. And ya, she seems to like Drax, but that's not going to last past us telling her pops got his head chopped off."

Right, there was also that. It wasn’t like Peter was completely out of ideas, but he really wanted someone else to come up with a plan this time, despite how awesomely his crazy one had worked last time. Hold up, “Why’s everyone looking at me?”

“We’re waiting for your 12% of a plan” Rocket quipped,

Betrayed, Peter frowned “My 12% of a plan was amazing, don’t even try and deny it. And the only thing I can think of is something no one’s going to like, or agree with.”

Rocket snorted something under his breath about how none of them had liked his last plan, but Peter manfully ignored him. There was a period of silence before Gamora prompted, “And what is it?”

“Hmm? Oh I was waiting for someone else to come up with something, ‘cause I’m pretty sure a prison break isn’t a good plan.” Peter reasoned.

“Oh, excellent plan.” Rocket exclaimed sarcastically, “And are we bringing Dassa into the prison or Ronan out?”

“Ronan out, preferably.” Peter clarified

“Hold up now, that’s not a good plan” Rocket disagreed as he seemed to realize Peter was being serious, staring at him like he had sprouted a second head. “Ronan’s on Xandar guarded by the Nova Corps best people, the Nova Corps who, might I be the one to remind everyone, just decided that we’re the good guys who they don’t need to cart off to prison the moment they see us. And I dunno ‘bout you, but when I get on their bad side again it’s going to be for something with a huge pay check at the end of it. Not for Ronan.”

“The girl has been in abusive captivity for months and she wishes to see her father. She’s been asking where he is since we got her.” Drax spoke up, very obviously not looking at them as he watched Dassa play with Groot. “It would be cruel to deprive her of a temporary reunion."

“Theoretically it could be possible too, with our set of skills” Gamora mused and Rocket looked betrayed.

“Wait, you’re on his side too? Can’t you see how ridiculous this all is?” He pleaded

Gamora clenched her jaw, looking away as she said, “I would’ve given anything to spend another day with my parents. We get him out, let him say goodbye, and then put him back. Ronan’ll be dead in three days, and we’ll be gone.”

“With the Nova Corps on our tail.” Rocket grumbled doubtfully, though he seemed somewhat softened from Gamora’s show of honesty.

“Well, not necessarily.” Peter mused, an idea springing to mind. Something that might make them all happy. “All we need to do is get Ronan out without being seen. Rocket, if you can break out of anywhere, I’m pretty sure you could break in as well. Gamora, you were an assassin, you must’ve needed a lot of stealth for some of the extremely moral things you used to do. Drax, you’re the only one of us who knows how to deal with children. And I, I can create a pretty fantastic distraction, if I don’t say so myself.”

Rocket snorted, shaking his head but sitting forward in interest all the same. “Ah what the heck, last time turned out alright. Just as long as no one gets seen, or killed."

A slight smirk curved Gamora’s lips up as she nodded, “I think I can do that.”

“Alright then,” Peter clapped his hands together, making sure Dassa was distracted by Groot as he leaned forward to start discussing the plan. “Here’s the first thing we’re going to do…”

 

~*~

 

Shifting where he sat cross-legged in the empty white room that was his cage, Ronan attempted to ignore the sounds of the handcuffs he wore clinking together. Though their appearance was that of only thin cuffs of metal connected by a chain little more than a foot long, their debilitating effects sank into his muscles, leaving him as weak as a Terran. Then again, perhaps Terran was not the best comparison there. Especially considering how the one known as Star-Lord had defeated him. Defeated him, and now here he was, cleaned of his face paint and dressed in bright orange. How humiliating.

Then again, over the past day and a half that Ronan had been in prison, he had realized quite quickly that it wasn’t the humiliation, the less than considerate way the guards treated him, or even his failure that was the worst part of being in a cage, but rather the fact that Ronan had no idea what had happened to his child. If Thanos knew about his defeat than she was dead. For all he really knew she had been killed a long time previous, as he only had the titan's word that she was still alive. All of this could’ve been, well actually,  _was,_ for nothing. He had failed, and now his only hope rested on four beings who defeated him and had absolutely no reason to help. More reason actually to harm him, make him pay for what he had done.  And what a better way than poetic justice? Though he didn’t remember, he didn’t doubt that he had killed Drax the Destroyers family. Wouldn’t it be a suitable revenge for the other to turn around and kill his? That was if they had even believed him enough to find her.

A slight buzz in the air had Ronan sitting up straighter, and he glanced around, not yet resigned enough to be unworried about the change.  Scrabbling sounds came from above him and he stood, quickly moving to the corner of the room. If they planned to drop something on him it would be best he wasn’t underneath.

Instead however, a panel hidden seamlessly in the ceiling was pushed aside and a furry masked face poked inside, hissing, “Alright melodramatic crazy dude, time to go”

Ronan stared, confused, “What?”

“Listen, I ain’t got all day, and they’re going to notice something’s up pretty soon, so let’s get the heck out of here!” Ah yes, now he recognized the creature. Rocket, he thought. One of the Guardians of the Galaxy. But what was he doing here? Unless…

“Did you find her? Is she alright?” He implored, striding forwards.

Rocket looked exasperated but answered all the same. “Ya, we’ve got Dassa, now come on if you want to see her”

They had her, they actually had his child. She was no longer with Thanos. That was all Ronan needed to know before he was jumping, grabbing the side of the hole in the roof and pulling himself up, gritting his teeth at the strain the action should not have caused. Once there he crouched, flinching back when he found himself face to face with Gamora. Despite whatever he might've expected, she merely glanced at him impassively before turning away, leading them further down what appeared to be a purposeless crawl space.

After about fifty meters they dropped down, running through a series of corridors and ducking behind whatever was available whenever soldiers ran past, apparently all going towards something in the opposite direction they were. Whenever they couldn’t get away in time Gamora would fire almost soundless stunning shots at the soldiers before they were seen, quickly dragging the unconscious bodies out of sight. A couple more turns that Ronan could see no rhyme nor reason for and they stopped next to a tucked away door.

“Here” Gamora whispered the first word Ronan had heard from her yet, glaring slightly at him.

Rocket nodded and smashed in the wall next to the door, revealing a mechanical panel that he quickly began attacking with tools pulled seemingly from nowhere.

After a few moments he let out a satisfied noise and declared, “Alright, get ready to duck and run.”

With that he threw the door open and ran, Ronan and Gamora quick on his tail as they stuck close to a low wall. When Ronan had full strength the pace he set would’ve been simple, but as he was now he was breathing heavily and winded by the time they made it to a junker ship he wasn’t even sure would actually fly. Nevertheless, it did indeed fly when Rocket took to the pilot’s seat, Gamora upholstering a weapon and pointing it at Ronan as they lifted off.

“One wrong movement and I’m taking your head off. We aren’t doing this for you, and you’re gonna be back here within 24 hours.” She warned, glaring at him as if just daring him to give her a reason.

Instead, he nodded warily, sinking to sit on a box propped up against the wall. Right now there were many things more important than his pride, or the fact that they would be returning him to his well-deserved death. “Where is she?” Ronan asked tensely.  

“On the Milano” Gamora replied, softening just the slightest bit, perhaps because of the concern he wasn’t even attempting to hide.

Nodding, Ronan sat back, immediately grabbing at the wall as Rocket made a narrow turn with the ship. Still, he held his tongue, taking the time in an attempt to parse out just what was happening. Dassa was on their ship. If they were lying, they wouldn’t know her name. Evidently these Guardians had gone to Thanos’ realm, succeeded where he had failed so many times previously in rescuing his daughter, and now had come and broken him out of prison so that he could see her? Not wanting to test how far the limits of the decency they were showing him went, Ronan kept silent, watching, waiting and thinking.

This wasn’t permanent freedom. They planned to allow him to see his daughter and would then return him to Xandar, maybe framing it as if they had caught him trying to escape. He’d go along with it too, if only he could see Dassa again. Go along with it and then die, knowing at least that his child was safe. That was everything, for her to be away from Thanos.  It didn't mean he had no other enemies out there, but the Guardians of the Galaxy wouldn’t hurt an innocent, surely. Ronan himself was no innocent, but his fate no longer mattered in the face of what could happen to Dassa. Would they take care of her? What would her life be like after he was gone? And was this his punishment that yet again he had no control over his daughter’s fate?

To Ronan’s surprise it was almost easy to leave the planet, having to evade the notice of only a few Nova Corp ships before they were in the sky. Rocket mentioned something about Quill being a great distraction, but he didn’t expand and Ronan didn’t dare ask.

When they had gotten into open space Ronan caught sight of a blue and orange ship waiting for them and he stood up, taking a step forwards. Not even a warning movement from Gamora could distract him. His daughter was on that ship. His Dassa, whom he had last seen face to face when she was stolen from him almost a year before.

Ronan barely remembered them getting closer and boarding the ship, or seeing the little tree that had been destroyed when the Dark Ather crashed, only coming back to himself when he saw his daughter sitting beside Drax, gesturing widely as she told a story.

“Dassa” Ronan barely managed to croak out her name.

Their eyes met and his daughter broke into a huge grin, yelling ‘daddy’ and running towards him. Falling to his knees he reached out, clutching the little girl to himself and burying his face in her short  damp hair. He was barely aware of Rocket and Gamora passing them to go into the cockpit, Drax staying seated where he was.

“Oh my daughter, my beautiful daughter” He murmured, ecstatic to finally be reunited with the child he had previously thought lost to him.

After some indeterminate amount of time she started squirming in his hold and Ronan allowed her to pull back, running his eyes over her to check for wounds, cursing the handcuffs which made it awkward holding her. There were a few bruises and bandaged places that made him burn with fury, but it wasn’t as bad as some of the things he had imagined. She was wearing a woman’s blue shirt he imagined belonged to Gamora, though on Dassa it was large enough to be a dress, tied at the waste with a lighter blue strip of cloth.

“Are you alright?” He asked, reaching out to hold her arm above where her wrist was heavily bandaged.

“I got a cut” Dassa explained, that achingly innocent relief still clear on her face. "But it’s okay papa, Drax bandaged it and kissed it better.”

Ronan closed his eyes in shame at the mention of Drax. Looking up at the Destroyer, Ronan hunched in on himself a bit, remembering Drax’s anger over what the Accuser had done to his family.

“Thank you” Ronan whispered, knowing the words were pathetically inadequate for what he owed the warrior.

For a second it seemed like Drax wouldn’t respond, but then he stood, Ronan automatically tensing in preparation to cover Dassa. He may have no more strength than a Terran at the moment, but hadn’t Peter Quill proved that they could be strong too?

Yet the Destroyer came no closer, staring at him with clear hate as he stated, “I would never do harm to an innocent, I am not you.”

With that he left the room, and Ronan barely noticed Gamora replacing him as a guard as he turned back to his daughter. The twin weights of shame and relief had never hung heavier upon him than they did now.    


	3. Chapter 3

Drax was, conflicted, to say the least.

Ronan had killed his family, slaughtered his innocent daughter and wife, then moved on as if it were nothing.  Now, despite Drax putting years into hunting the Accuser and killing everyone with a connection to him, here Ronan was, unharmed and unchallenged.  Spending time with his own daughter before they gave him back to the Nova Corps and deprived the girl forever of her father.  Her father, who she'd wanted nothing more than to be reunited with after being abused and held captive by Thanos. 

While Rocket, Gamora and Peter Quill had gone down to retrieve Ronan, Drax had stayed with Dassa, speaking with her and listening to her stories.  Every single one of them that involved her father spoke of a Ronan that Drax could barely comprehend the existence of.  Instead of the dreaded Accuser of the Kree there was a loving father who sung his daughter to sleep and played out fantastical games to her amusement. The dichotomy between the two personas was almost impossible to reconcile. And while it didn’t make him hate the Kree any less, it did make him question things.

So, as he had begun to do when he didn’t understand something, Drax went to a member of this new family he'd accidentally acquired. As Gamora had spent the most time around Ronan out of all of them, she was the one he approached.

After pulling her away from the group in the cockpit and sending Rocket to guard Ronan, Drax and Gamora moved to the communal sleeping room, out of earshot of the others.  He sat and played with his fingers, wondering how to start this conversation.

Blunt had always worked. “Did you know about Dassa?”

Gamora licked her lips, shaking her head. “No. I was more concerned with trying to get away from him and Thanos than finding out why they were working together.” She paused, looking away as she admitted. “I guess, Ronan did seem distracted, like he wasn’t completely focused on what he was doing, but it didn't help me, so I ignored it.”

Drax nodded, resting his fidgeting hands. “He would've been distracted because Thanos had Dassa.  When did this begin?"

“At the very beginning” Gamora answered immediately, “He'd always hated Thanos, didn't want to be allying with him."  She allowed him to contemplate that for a few moments before tentatively asking, "What's this about?”

“I don’t understand how he is with Drassa.” Drax confessed, voice low. “He kills mindlessly, destroys innocent families, yet has a daughter whom he loves enough to give himself up for?  How can that be reconciled?”

Pursing her lips, Gamora looked down, and Drax was reminded that her family had been killed when she was young. Since then the only father figure she’d known was Thanos, a terrible being who had been so horrible to her.

Drax opened his mouth to apologize or _something_ , but Peter Quill spoke first. “Maybe he changed afterwards?”

Glancing in surprise at the newcomer by the door, Drax frowned, confused. “What do you mean?”

Peter grimaced slightly, but answered, scuffing his foot against the ground. "Like, Dassa's about, what would you say, 5 or 6? So Ronan's a murderous scumbag or whatever, killing indiscriminately, and then he has a kid, sees the light, has his kid kidnapped by Thanos.  Who gets him to go on this whole 'kill all Xandarians' thing, with him being a Kree Accuser and the peace treaty as a reason and motivation for it, and he goes along with it 'cause he's got no other choice? I dunno man, I'm just grasping at straws here."

While most of it made sense, Drax was even more confused about certain parts. "What light would he have seen, and why would you be grasping at straws? What straws?"

Peter looked exasperated and Drax realized belatedly that those must've been metaphors for something else.

"Seeing the light is having a realization, this context that family is awesome and you shouldn't kill other peoples. And grasping at straws is just like trying to find reasons." Peter explained, though Drax was slightly mollified to find he didn't sound too patronizing.

"Thanos had to look for Ronan" Gamora drew their attention back to her, frowning at the ground. "He wasn't, Ronan wasn't with the other Kree or Accusing anyone. Thanos found him on a very isolated planet, I don't even remember its name it has so little to do with outsiders."

"And we don't know who her mother is, so who knows? Maybe she had a hand in his apparent desire to disappear.  Was a reason for it, I mean" Peter added, looking slightly less pinched around his eyes over having the Accuser on his ship. He frowned suddenly, “I’m not saying you have to like the dude, or should even sympathize or whatever, ‘cause man I know you hate him, and you’ve totally got every reason to. I’m just trying to figure out his motives too, ya know?  Don't usually care about things like that, but with the kid...”  He trailed off and shrugged

Drax nodded definitively, standing. The other two startled slightly at the abrupt motion, but Drax paid them no heed. 

He needed to speak with Ronan.

 

~*~

 

Ronan sat with his daughter, smiling slightly as he watched her dance with the small tree in it's pot on the table.  Groot, it had said its name was, but not much else. Nothing else, actually, other than ‘I am Groot’.  Dassa didn't seem to mind though, her eyes bright as they moved to the rather, _interesting_ music while Ronan watched on.

"Come on Papa! You have to dance with us!" Dassa demanded, reaching out and grabbing Ronan's hand. The Accuser laughed, letting her help him to his feet.  How long it had been since he'd laughed, since he'd had reason to.

"I don't know how to dance.  I'm afraid I'll step on your feet if I leave you down there." Ronan explained mock-seriously, picking his daughter up and letting the mask fall as he swung her into the air.

Dassa screeched with laughter, stretching her arms out to either side of herself like wings. After flying her around a bit more Ronan caught sight of Drax standing at the other side of the room. His smile faded as he remembered that this was only temporary, that this was goodbye before he was rightly killed for his actions.  Pulling her back down to himself as the Destroyer motioned to the side, Ronan hugged his daughter, pressing his face into her hair for a few seconds before moving back.

"Why do you look sad papa?" Dassa asked with all the innocence of a child.  He had no idea how her life on the run and Thanos hadn't destroyed that innocence, but was so very thankful for it.

Internally Ronan winced, having not meant to let her see his thoughts. Outwardly he smiled, placing her back in the ground. "I'm not sad, I'm happy to have you back." Not wanting her to be present for whatever Drax wanted to say or do, he suggested, "Why don't you dance some more with Groot, I'm sure he'll be better at it than I am."

"I can teach you to dance!" Peter Quill appeared beside Drax, a bright grin on his face as he looked at Dassa. Lowering his voice slightly and glancing around as if sharing a secret he added, "It's only really me and Groot who can dance on this ship, though don't tell Gamora I said that!"

Dassa giggled, but waited for Ronan to give permission before accepting and allowing herself to be pulled along with Peter into a strange dance that involved utterly ridiculous wide arm movements.  Attempting to hide his nervousness, Ronan moved in the director Drax had indicated, the other following him into a small side room that looked like a storage area.

"You killed my daughter and wife, murdered them and many other innocents, yet you have a child of your own." The Destroyer narrowed his eyes as he started off bluntly, "How can you live with that?"

Ronan winced, searching for words. There was nothing he really could say. He knew if anyone killed Dassa he wouldn't stop until they had been torn apart and put back together, only to do it all over again. He had even tried to do it to Thanos before the Titan displayed just how futile his attempts were. That Drax wasn't doing the same to Ronan at that very moment showed just how much self control he had. Control that had been missing when Drax'd brought Ronan to Knowhere for the infinity gem.

"I didn't, I haven't," Ronan stumbled over his words, stopping and biting his lip before attempting to continue. The least he owed Drax was an explanation "I didn't have Dassa then, I didn't understand the connection a parent has, should have, with their child. Since she was born I've stopped, I've not killed anyone except in her defense.” He grimaced, aware of how ridiculous that sounded.

Honestly Ronan had always had some, well, not _doubts_ , but concerns perhaps, with how final and demanding Kree justice was. He had grown up with a father who firmly believed in the strict rules that governed their kind, and who was very willing to make sure that Ronan also followed them down to the letter. So it had been with everyone else. Those who were guilty, who has not followed the rules were punished, that was the way of things. Perhaps the punishments were brutal, and the customs that Ronan needed to follow as Accuser were a bit harsh, but that was the way of the Kree, and so the way of Ronan.  

When Dassa had been born however, all of that seemed to change. Her mother had hardly been an important Kree, someone Ronan had lain with once, never expecting a child from the encounter. When she had been given to him and the mother fled—no desire to have born a child of someone like an Accuser—Ronan had thought that he would treat her the same way his own father had treated him. It was the way of the Kree.  Then he'd seen her and immediately fell in love with the tiny helpless child in his arms.  At that moment he knew he couldn’t raise her in the life he had, and so had abandoned it, leaving to get as far away from anything—his mistakes, his people, the shame of what he had done to others who had had children—as he could.  And he had managed for a cluster of years, until Thanos.  Not a single person dead and a wonderful fantasy of a life with his daughter other than the many safety precautions they both clung to.

“And now that you do, you think it changes anything?” Drax asked, completely unreadable.

Ronan tensed up even further, watching Drax warily. Though he admitted the other man had the right to attack him, to kill him, it didn’t mean he wouldn’t go down without a fight. Despite the fact that he was so weakened and still couldn’t move his hands beyond a foot apart. He wasn’t helpless, and he wouldn’t spend his last moments with his daughter unable to pay attention past the pain.

“Only what I will do in the future” He replied warily,

But Drax only nodded, still watching him. “So had Thanos not found you, you would’ve stayed with Dassa where you were not known, could not further Kree justice,” His tone was slightly mocking here and Ronan carefully didn’t react. “And have nothing but what you gained with your own hands?”

 _Very_ carefully didn’t react. How did Drax know all this? Was he just fishing for information or had Gamora known and told? Ronan swallowed, licking his lips. “Had Thanos not found us, yes, we would’ve stayed there until it was time to find another place to hide. Dassa was safe.”

Ronan still didn't know if his answers had been taken positively or negatively, and again Drax continued his questioning without giving any clues.  “What happened to her mother?”

Narrowing his eyes, Ronan answered, “It is not smart to become attached to the child of an Accuser. She found out she was pregnant, left Dassa with me and fled.”

Drax hummed consideringly, straightening his stance.  Ronan flinched back and instantly regretted the betraying movement, staring definitely back at the Destroyer. Yet again the other did nothing to him, instead turning to leave.

“I’m sorry.” The words felt as if they had been torn from him and Ronan closed his eyes for a moment before looking back at Drax where he'd paused in the doorway.  Now he had started, might as well continue. “I am sorry for what I did. Not everything, not everyone I’ve killed, but the innocents, your family.  I know it doesn’t change anything, or that I would accept it in your position, but I wanted you to know.”

The other still not having turned around, Ronan began to doubt Drax would reply as the silence stretched.  Just when he'd given up and was waiting for the other to leave, Drax spoke.

“It does not change anything, no.” He responded without looking back. “I hate you for what you have done, and I greatly doubt that that will change in what time you have left.  I care nothing now for your fate, but I will take care of Dassa.  She will grow up loved.”

Drax left without a sound and Ronan found himself inordinately grateful for the departure as he felt liquid gathering in his eyes.  He had not cried in many years, since he was a very young child in fact, but it appeared that this here was too much.  With his death Ronan would be leaving a child behind, his perfect child.  Yet here was a man who hated him, who Ronan had done such a great injustice, promising that he would take care of her. Had Ronan been in his position, had he killed Drax and his wife instead of his wife and daughter, he would never have done the same.

Quickly Ronan wiped at the tears that had escaped, scrubbing almost viciously in an attempt to dispel any remaining evidence of his sorrow. He would cry at his death, but not for himself. For the daughter he would leave behind, and for her life which he would never see.


	4. Chapter 4

When Peter heard Drax walking into the cockpit, a slight smile appeared on his face, confusing Rocket as he'd paused in the middle of his argument about why the racoon should stop taking apart his ship in order to create bombs.

Drax may absolutely hate Ronan, but the guy was predictable.  When Peter had walked in on him asking Gamora for more information about Ronan and his child, he had known then what Drax would do.  Well, he had known two things that Drax _might_ do, but that was just down to semantics.  Either way, the Destroyer was adopting Dassa.  Not as a replacement for his own lost daughter, because no one would ever replace her, but because they seemed to fit so well into father and daughter rolls.  Peter had seen the man with the child, the instant connection the two of them had.  Of course that would mean a kid on the Milano, but hey, Peter had grown up with Ravagers on a ship and he hadn’t turned out so bad.

That was about as far as Peter's first idea on what Drax could do went, but the second one continued a bit further.  And while Peter wasn’t all that happy about it, he didn’t have any big grudges that would prevent him from letting it happen.  They’d need to upgrade the security and hide away for a bit, but things would be okay for the most part.  After all, hadn’t they all already gotten far too many second chances?  What was one more in the grand scheme of things?

As if on cue Drax spoke, declaring in a firm voice, “I hate him, but I am not Ronan.”

And Peter’s smile turned into a grin. Drax was going with idea number two.

 

~*~

 

Hours later Ronan was sitting next to one of the ship's windows, staring out at Xandar and the surrounding planets.  For the whole time he'd been onboard they'd been meandering about just outside of orbit, staying out of view of the other ships—who he assumed were looking for him—when they passed.  Floating aimlessly until they returned him to Xandar.

Dassa slept in his arms, laying so that the chains still connecting his hands wouldn’t disturb her, but he couldn’t find it in himself to join her in rest.  It was a new day, which meant they would be returning soon, dropping him off and taking his daughter away from him for the remainder of his short life.  He was convinced now that they’d get him to say he’d escaped and the Guardians had brought him back, but it didn't really matter.  They had already done him such a great service already, taking his daughter away from Thanos when the Titan had been off guard, and promising to take care of her.

The ship shifted in space and Ronan refocused on the outside.  For a little while he just watched, clutching Dassa tightly as the realization hit.  Xandar was shrinking in the window, not growing larger.  Ronan sat up with a frown.  What was happening?  Weren’t they returning to the planet to drop him off?  

He glanced around the room, finding Rocket sitting curled around Groot and playing with the growing tree. “What’s happening?” Ronan asked suspiciously.

“No idea, no one tells me anything” Rocket barely looked at him with the answer, completely focused on Groot.

Ronan narrowed his eyes. The racoon had to be lying, he wouldn’t be so calm if he didn’t know what they were doing.  Hesitating for a little while longer, Ronan watched as they left the solar system and it shrunk in the distance.  It didn't take too long after that for him to decide he needed to know what was happening or he’d drive himself mad wondering.  With that, Ronan stood, shifting Dassa carefully in his arms and letting the chain hang loose as he moved.  To add credence to the idea that Rocket did indeed know what was happening, the racoon scarcely reacted to his movement, glancing up with a slight grin making little attempt to hide on his face.

Heading towards the cockpit, Ronan was careful not to wake his daughter as he caught sight of Drax on the way, tentatively sliding up beside him.

“What’s happening?” Ronan asked softly, still wary of the other for himself, but curiosity and the knowledge that Dassa was safe with him winning out.

Drax turned to look at the girl Ronan held, reaching out and lightly stroking her hair as he answered somewhat obscurely, “You say you’ve changed, and Gamora’s tale makes me believe that for Dassa you are trying to.  I’ve already told you that I am not you.  I still despise you, but I will not take you from your daughter.”

Ronan stood frozen, not certain he understood. “You’re not bringing me back?”

Finally Drax looked at Ronan, taking a step closer and grabbing the back of his neck in a tight grip that could be taken as either comforting or threatening, though he really wasn’t sure which this was.  Ronan struggled to stay still, reminding himself almost hopefully that Drax wouldn’t attack him while Dassa was in a position to be harmed.  A thumb dug into the skin behind his ear and he let out an involuntary breath of pain, completely lost as to what was happening.

But Drax made no move to harm him further, examining Ronan’s face for a few moments before answering his question. “No. You will not die so soon.”

With that Drax released the Accuser, walking past him and out of sight.  Unfreezing after a couple moments of shock, Ronan closed his eyes, burying his face in his daughter’s hair.  Crying once again, this time in relief.  The Guardians would not be giving him back to the Xandarians to die.  Though he didn’t deserve one, they were giving him a second chance.  He'd probably never be left alone, and Drax and Gamora wouldn’t stop hating him, but he could live with it, with _anything_ if it meant he could live to take care of Dassa.  If it meant that Ronan would be able to see his daughter grow up.  


End file.
